When I Grow Up.

I have never understand the concept of "growing-up." When I was little I was told I would be a woman someday.  I freaked.  What's a woman?  My emotionally charged answer was "I don't want to be a woman, I want to be Hannah!"  The idea of being something other than I already was did not sit well.  A grown-up sounded like a stranger, and I was taught to be afraid of them.  The notion of growing up still confuses me.  What is a grown-up?  What makes you a grown-up?  Being married?  Not in this century.  Having kids?  Heck no.  Being financially independent?  Ehhhh.  What if you stay on the family plan?  What if you can't find a job?  What if you want to support yourself and just travel?  Can you be a grown up without a nine to five?  I think I'm not alone in saying, I have no idea what makes a grown-up.  The only sure thing that dictates adulthood is the law, and according to that after 18 you are supposed to have it all together.

Still there are a lot of people out there who are wiser than me that I admire.  I would say I want to be like them when I grow-up, but I think growing up is a process.  Here are some people I want to be like today.

1. Tina Fey: Duh.
2. Stewart/Colbert: They are the only way I can look at what's going on in the world without crying.
3. Martin Luther King Jr: I've got lots of dreams.
4. Winston Churchill: He was a boss.  He lived in barracks chain smoking and drinking all day and still lived to be in his eighties.  That and surviving WWII.
5. Ellen DeGeneres: Clearly I like comedians.  And who doesn't want to be one that goes against the grain?
6. J.K. Rowling:  Perseverance is key.  And writing is a great way to get through tough times.
7. Ryan Gosling:  Be him? Okay I meant marry him.
8. My friends:  If I didn't want to be like my friends, I would say I need some new ones.
9. My parents: That may sound cliche, but I know a lot of people who don't want to be anything like their parents.  Keeping your kid's respect isn't guaranteed.
10. My friend Dylan, age 15.  What?  Who would want to be like a teenager?  If you ever start to lose faith in humanity, talk to a kid who has lived with cancer.  If he can have faith, I can too.

The Perks of Being a Wallweed.

Some people would be described as wallflowers.  They are quiet, mysterious, and attractive in a awkward yet intelligent way.  I am not one of those people.  Quiet is the furthest from the truth. Any attempt at mystery is given away because I'm honest to the point of bluntness.  And although I am intelligent, my awkwardness definitely trumps that in most social settings.  Needless to say I tend to stand out and not because I'm super suave.  If it's not my voice carrying across a room, it's my pink skinny jeans or my red hair.  Despite how much I may seem to stand out in a crowd, I still often feel like a wallflower.  Sometimes I feel overlooked or brushed to the side.  And unlike wallflowers, who inspire awe when discovered, I stay left with the other wallweeds who rarely get much more than acknowledgement they exist. We wallweeds live in the same soil as the cool kids, just dressed in our own petals.

The thing is, one person's weed is another person's flower.  Some walk by dandelions without slowing down.  Some pick them and cast them aside.  Some try to crush their roots to make room for more socially acceptable flowers.  Alas, they keep coming back, insisting on being noticed by matching the bright yellow of the sun.  But other people dare to stop.  Some of these people are wallflowers, who know uniqueness when they see it; others may be the favored rose who is ready for something else in their bouquet.  One weed may recognize the beauty in another, even if they are still in denial of their own.  Weeds make the best flowers.  If you pick a dandelion at the right time, it might just make your wishes come true.